Ok, in my mind, the MOVIE was awesome. The WARGS, The ARMORED
TROLLS, the CORPSE-LIGHTS, GOLLUM, the BATTLES, GIMLI, AAAAAGH. Very
good. Met and exceeded expectations. Jackson however, does go off
the true plot so all your memorized dialog is worthless. Here are
some mini-spoilers for you.
1) Boromir "Just wounded". Wakes up as he goes over the falls. Ouch!
2) Arwen is a guy.
3) Gimli is a guy.
4) Entire movie done as "Musical". Must see? Legolas doing "Can-Can"
at Helm's Deep.
5) Saruman's Palantir starts picking up old "Munsters" episodes.
Renames Uruk-Hai "Hermans".
6) Gandalf and Balrog mend differences, go on wacky "good-cop/crazy
cop" buddy movie quest of revenge. (Best line? One of Balrog's
goblins Legolas shot was just "one day from retirement, man".)
7) Merry and Pippin eaten by orcs. Remainder of Fellowship rejoices.
8) Nazgul reveal themselves to be quite good at hockey.
9) Gollum actually used to be an accountant named "Irv".
10) Sauron misunderstood. Actually, just wants a hug!
Jeffery A. Dobberpuhl
(apologies to the gang in 238 who saw this already :P)