Yeah, way to go Ben…I’m supposed to bankrupt out…I guess I have to find a new calling card…maybe I should start cursing Russ’s characters or something…ohh wait I cant 'cause them Free peeps messed up my program!
Catarac Nazghul
It’s OK, I only devoted 7 turns in getting that Arty to you. 
-Dragmaster Russ
He claims to have gotten the whole state of Michigan to put a hex on Russ.
Dug
Elves Love Freaks
Naldurgarth approached Akhorahil’s chamber to discuss the finer aspects of dwelling in the deserts of Mordor. He heard a strange scratching noise from within. He knew Aky was supposed to be hard at work boning up on his curses studies. Upon opening the door, he found the Blind Sorcerer with a broom in hand strumming it like some sort of mad mandolinist.
“What are you doing, my Lord?”
“Why, I’m playing my magic harp as I learn Curses!”
“What, are you blind AND DEAF? Does this sound like a harp? You’re playing a #$^&*ing broom!! Someone was seen walking out the front gate with the harp just this morning. He said you were letting him borrow it?!”
“Oh. Crap. I knew this harp felt different. Thought it might just need some tuning up. I believe my harp just might have been PILFERED, Sir! But I could have sworn I chained it up on that wall over there last night,” Aky said pointing to a distant wall. Naldurgarth followed the finger to see a candelabra chained to the wall. Naldurgarth turned and left with disdain in his heart.
-A True Tale from the Bard of Mirkwood
ps- Never be afraid to taunt your own team! 
I bow to your superior writing talent…
You are now definately on my list of people to kill in the future Drunken Monkey vs Team Lush Invitational!!
I’ll make sure you’re on my team, then.
Russ / King of the Drunken Monkey Lushes
What ?! Ben is dead ?! No wonder I haven’t been getting my allowance for the last few turns.
But of course, with the lack of “inferior” Ohio State banter on our group, I should have known something was up
Bucky Gopher Hoarm
Being on the same team wont stop me from killing you, Russ !!
It will be a hinderance, I suspect. All I need is for you to be distracted for ONE TINY SECOND . . . and it’s like WHAM, sword right up the . . .
Yes, with the FP’s reluctance to carry on good taunting, we’re starting to turn on each other.
-Dragmaster Russ
You all suck, I rule!
- Ben
Dog Lord
Song played at the Doglord funeral pyre…
Sung by the immortal Drew Carey… 
"Ben, you’re always running here and there
You felt you’re not wanted anywhere
If you ever looked behind
And don’t like what you find (Michigan)
There’s something you should know
You’ve got a place to go…
Ben, most people would turn you away
I don’t listen to a word they say
They don’t see you as I do
I wish they would try to
I’m sure they’d think again
If they had had a friend like Ben
BURPPPPP
See Ya
-Dug
<<You all suck, I rule!>>
- Ben, Finish up your Chapter 9 proceedings, get back on your feet, rebuild some equity, THEN we’ll talk.
-Dragmaster Russ
Chapter 9, thats too easy…when you fail the Eye, you have to deal with lawyers…FOREVER!!!
Gondor Invades Mordor!
In a stunning development, Ecthelion’s Span, the new 6 lane bridge to Osgiliath, hosted it’s inaugural crossing of steel armoured heavy cavalry from South Gondor followed quickly by bronze weilding Dunadan footmen hauling dozens of assault towers, rams and catapults. The Pride of Gondor moved quickly to re-establish their dominion on the East Bank, overrunning numerous platoons of bewildered and terrified orcs before re-capturing Osgiliath and heading into the mountains for the last phase of the final assault on Mordor proper.
Goromil’s Heroics!
Local boy Arch Mage Goromil has done it again! This time, he singlehandedly slew an entire enemy curse squad using only a pipe cleaner and badly out of tune banjo. “They actually spent the day killing each other, I just had to point the blind one at the other 3 and presto! I guessed rightly that the stringed instrument would attract his attention. The pipe cleaner was actually held in reserve the whole time. Maybe it’ll see action at Mount Doom next week…” This statement appears to confirm the persistent rumours that the concerted efforts of the new Gondorian invasion and then Ent-riding Woodmen have met in the Mordor desert.
Travel Restrictions Reduced!
The New Colony of Umbar is open for business! Tourism and Development Minister Boromir III announced today that the terrorist threat is now over! The petulent Khandian Freedom Party of the Avenger has finally been crushed utterly in the depths of south east Khand. As the last camel skin tent burned to the ground, Warlord Denethor, Protector of the Realm, declared and end to hostilities in all the lands south of Mordor. “There’s nothing left to be wary of. We’ve scried the whole of it and have come to the conclusion that our superiority in both strategies and individual warrior skill has borne the natural fruit of inevitability.”
uhh…what? Oh, yeah, sure. Thursday? MORNING~!?! But… Oh man, I’ve gotta start coming home earlier after Wednesday night hockey games…
Russ, do you have any suggestions for me…oooooh…
Hmmm . . . 4 BC headache powders, full glass of water, and a 3-hour nap. If that doesn’t work, go see a neurologist. They’ll give you a headscan for US$1300 then put you on some funky drugs that make your toes tingle and make sodas taste like someone’s old tobacco spit.
Where’s my turn?? Want to see this highly over-publicized freep victory Veo is spewing about.
Tip for Thralin III: you’ll need a lot more than 800 troops for a Major Town. Ha ha! Stupid Stuntie.
Stonewall Floyd
Hey Stewie! There’s a dwarf player! No, REALLY! Look! An army at 2909! You’re not as alone as you think!
Alone? You should see my pdf…I’m FAR from alone. Friendless, maybe, alone? Nah.
May still be friendless but you have new neighbors.
Ren, founder of New Gondorian Real Estate